Hey dolls,
So it's pretty obvious that nowadays everybody is on the hunt for true happiness, I mean who wouldn't want to be truly happy?! It's a known fact that happier people tend to live longer and healthier lives. But if you were to make a list of goals to achieve in life, for many people it would to own a nice car, or a big house, or have lots of money and have a successful career. We believe having all these materialistic things in life will result in us being happy.
So why are there so many miserable on the earth today?
It seems the more gadgets we own, the more miserable we are. The more improved telecommunications are, the lonelier we feel.
And for a long time I've thought that happiness will only occur for a reason, but I was wrong. True happiness is actually so simple. Almost so simple that we miss it.
The world is so materialistic and superficial at this day in age. So I've discovered a few secrets on how people have long term happiness without all the materialistic things.
1. LIVE FOR NOW
Nowadays, many people have an "I'll be happy when" attitude: "I'll be happy when.. my exams finish / when I have more money / when I find my soul-mate / when I win the lottery". Don't wait and depend on something that may or may not happen in the future. Live for now, because the future will always come but you won't get today again. Don't depend your happiness on money, looks, fame.etc. A group of successful and famous people were interviewed and they all said they still feel "empty", because although money can give you short-term happiness, you'll just get used to it and want more. Many celebrities are so used to all the money and the fame, they become lonely and empty and get caught up in drugs, alcohol, rehab.etc.
Money doesn't always guarantee happiness. At least not long term happiness anyway.
2. STOP FEELING SORRY FOR YOURSELF
Self pity isn't your best friend. It's in fact your worst enemy. When you feel sorry for yourself you're not dealing with the situation, you're just holding on to the emotions, and it's pointless holding on to emotions that are only holding you back. Let go of the past and free yourself. You'll only make the situation worse. Through your blaming, complaining and shame, you're responsible for your own unhappiness.
"Worrying is like a rocking chair. It takes up a lot of energy and doesn't get you anywhere"
Alternative? Use your energy to solve your dilemma, the lesson you learnt and just accepting things. Your future has no room for the past.
3.QUESTION YOUR THOUGHTS
"The mind is a place of it's own, and in itself can make a heaven of hell, a hell of heaven"
We go through 60,000 thoughts a day! But 80% of those thoughts are negative. We as humans are really cynical. This is because, as scientists have discovered, our ancestors always had to stay alert for bad things. Therefore, we're programmed to expect the worst.
However, suffering comes from believing your own thoughts. Any dilemma I've been in, the outcome is never as bad as my mind made it out to be, and caused me to be tormented upon by my own false illusions.
There's a well known story about how a wise grandfather told his grandson about the story of the ongoing battle within humans. "We all have 2 wolves within us: One is called unhappiness, and that's all the greed, resentment, bitterness and jealousy. The other is called happiness, and that's all the joy, love, kindness and compassion. Everyday these 2 wolves are constantly battling." The grandson asks "who wins the battle?", and the grandfather says "the one you feed".
4. FOCUS ON GRATITUDE
We focus on what we don't have rather than what we do have. How much time do you spend focusing on your problems rather than on gratitude? "You never know what you have till it's gone", the fact is, you do know what you have, you just didn't appreciate it.
Next time you're stuck in traffic and you're complaining, remember that in other countries automobiles are unheard of.
Next time you complain that there's no food you like to eat in your house, remember that there's adults and children in other countries are starved day in, day out, with no way of getting food as good as you have.
Next time you feel lost and unsure of where you're heading in life, think of the people who are short-lived and didn't have the opportunity to think about what they wanted to do with their lives.
It makes a huge difference in life when you act out of gratitude.
5. BE KIND AND GIVE OUT
Kindness is a type of happiness that everybody is capable of. It's within us to be good; the more you give, the more you receive. However, people nowadays are unkind and bitter due to their unkind treatment they've received in the past. Don't see kindness as a chore, think of it as an opportunity for you to grow as a person. So give out and show acts of love.
"The happiest people contribute to something greater than themselves"
6. DON'T LET SOCIETY CREATE YOU
Society and the media tell us day in, day out "you need to be thinner, tanner, have bigger boobs, a new nose, new car, more money" but the media just want to earn more money off you!
Everyday, when you look at your own reflection in the mirror, instead of looking for flaws, look for the features you do like (for example I tell myself that I like my eyes and curvy-ness of my body the most) and also look beyond the external factors, praise the achievements you've done: little or big! (for example, I'm proud of myself for completing and passing my Duke Of Edinburgh award.)
Remember, it's society that's ugly, not you. You're beautiful.
Neneh
♥
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